When You Assume
by E Salvatore
Summary: Sam stumbles upon our favorite couple in an abandoned office and immediately assumes that they are participating in certain…ahem, illicit activites. Humor ensues. CaKe, of course. Part of my SWB Initiative.


**WHEN YOU ASSUME**

**Sam stumbles upon our favorite couple in an abandoned office and immediately assumes that they are participating in certain…ahem, **_**illicit **_**activites. Humor ensues. CaKe, of course. Part of my SWB Initiative.**

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><p>Sam Hanna is a good agent.<p>

He's fast, professional, trained and experienced. He's resourceful and has many abilities that make him perfect for certain ops. And yet he's someone people can relate to, someone who can divulge information from right under your nose.

Yes, Sam Hanna is a good agent.

But you see, like most good agents, Sam is also a curious man. He must know what is going on at all times, why, how, who. He must know every single detail, because when you're undercover, any loss of information can prove to be fatal. And even when he's not undercover, at the best of times, Sam is simply inquisitive.

And that is exactly why, when he stumbles upon a supposedly empty office that is most definitely _not _empty, he walks right in.

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><p><em>Wait till G hears this<em>, Sam grins to himself, feeling quite accomplished. After all, he _did _just single-handedly bring in a major gang after only three days undercover, with no back-up from his team…well, except for Eric.

And so, feeling on top of the world, Agent Sam Hanna walks down the long aisle that leads to his desk, one that is lined with doors on either side that lead to empty offices.

Or so he thought.

Because when he passes by the fourth door to his left, Sam's alert senses cause him to stop in his tracks and then retrace his steps so that he's standing directly in front of the door. The door that leads to an office which is most definitely _not _empty, judging by the moans he's hearing. _Feminine _moans.

Thinking quickly, Sam knows that the only two ladies in the building at this time of the day are Hetty and Kensi, because everyone else is out for lunch except their team. And he's pretty sure that even if Hetty _is _getting any action, she wouldn't be doing so anywhere in this building. This line of thought leads to a grimace on his face – he's heard of one too many elderly ladies parading around in lingerie. _Scary_, Sam shudders.

He shakes his head as if to clear away his thoughts and focuses on what he's hearing; murmurs between Kensi and someone else. A few more seconds of thought leads him to speculate that the guy in the office is most definitely Callen, because it definitely sounds like his friend, and besides, who hasn't noticed the sexual tension between those two?

Smirking to himself, Sam places his hand on the doorknob, ready to barge in and humiliate the pair, an incident that will make for some good memories and a couple of good-natured laughs later. Knowing what he does – that Kensi and Callen have probably noticed the shadow lingering outside, and therefore thrown on some clothes, thus eliminating the chance of him walking in on them unaware – he twists the doorknob in his hand and steps in…to a scene he most definitely did _not _predict.

"Hey Sam," Kensi greets…from the floor, where she's leaning against Callen, with his legs on either side of her. They're fully clothed, he observes, and definitely not doing anything incriminating he could've teased them about. In fact, he notes as he scrutinizes them closely- Callen seems to be kneading Kensi's bare _shoulders, _her hair twisted up in a bun and out of the way.

"Uh, yeah, hi to you too. What're you guys doing here?" His voice conveys his confusion in his earlier greetings. "I mean, what are you guys _doing_?"

Kensi turns around and grins triumphantly at Callen. "Told 'ya he would get the wrong idea."

"Yeah, I owe you 5 bucks for that. Thanks, Sam." He nods towards his confused friend, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"For what? And why are you…giving her a massage, G?" After a beat, Sam sticks his head out in the hallway and peers around cautiously. Finding no one, he closes the door and leans against it. "You guys are drunk, aren't you?" He accuses them, part jokingly and part disbelievingly.

Kensi rolls her eyes while Callen starts to explain. "Kensi here hit the ground kinda hard when we were trying to duck from an explosion."

"Half-truth!" Kensi cries. "He _pushed_ me to the ground kinda hard when we were trying to duck from an explosion."

"For your own good!" Callen defends his actions as Sam crosses his arms against his chest, getting ready for an infamous session of bickering.

"You were over-reacting! It wasn't even _that _big a blast!" She retorts. Sam notes with amusement that though they're having…well, a _heated discussion_, Callen's hands are still working on Kensi's shoulders.

"Well is it my fault that I was trying to keep you safe?" Callen finally says after a few seconds, getting Sam's attention.

"No," Kensi admits hesitantly after a moment's thought. "Thank you, even though-"

"-You can keep yourself safe." Callen and Sam chime. "We know."

"Cute." Kensi says dryly.

Sam shrugs. "So, what's that got to do with him being your masseuse for the day?" He asks.

Callen rolls his eyes. "Apparently, she hit the ground _really _hard, and it's my fault, which I admit," He hurriedly adds the last part before they get caught up in another argument. "So she demands that I help her."

"Ah," Sam nods. "Good point, Kensi." He acknowledges, earning him a satisfied and smug smile from said agent. "Hey G, next time I hit the ground, do I get the same thing?" He teases.

"Sure Sammy-Poo, why don't you go ask Hetty." Callen suggests, shooting him a pointed glare from his spot against an old desk.

This causes an already-amused Kensi to burst out into laughter while Sam sulks. "I get it," He holds up his hands in defeat. "Now that you've got her, you don't need your best friend anymore." He turns around and once again places his hand on the doorknob, ready to leave the two agents alone, because despite all this light-hearted banter, he knows that they need some privacy. And not to mention the fact that it's really awkward to see Kensi trying to supress her moans, though somewhat funny.

"I'm just gonna go pick on Deeks. And maybe Eric." He informs them, fooling no one. Kensi shots him a smile and Callen nods. Sam pulls open the door, shooting one last warning over his shoulders. "Behave, kids! Wouldn't want any mini-Callens to be made here, like what I assumed you two were doing earlier." He jokes, shooting them a suggestive look.

The last thing he hears from Callen causes him to stumble from a moment before he regains his composure and walks away.

"Don't worry Sam, we keep that for when we're at home!"

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><p>Yes, Sam Hanna is a good agent, and a curious man.<p>

True to his word, he wanders into the office and picks on Deeks, an activity which has become somewhat of a second-nature which requires no thought. And so his mind begins to occupy himself, still reeling from the implications of Callen's words. It takes a few seconds for the words to sink in, and when he does, he groans out loud.

"_Shit_!"

Deeks never did figure out why Sam handed over 50 bucks to Hetty that day.

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><p><strong>Hey guys! Long time no see! Or maybe it's been a week or two. Hmm…what can I say? I can't stay away from you guys!<strong>

**Okay, so here's the first of the two CaKe one-shots I plan to post today. Why am I posting so many one-shots? Well, there's some info after this note, and for more, you can click on my profile, my homepage or my Twitter, both of which you can find on my profile.**

**This one's just random stuff for your entertainment. If you need some real depth and musings like the ones from **_**THTOYL, **_**be sure to check out **_**Uncharted Waters **_**which will be up in a few hours or so.**

**Until then, review or PM me to let me know what you think!**

_**E Salvatore,**_

_**April 2011.**_

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><p><strong>The Screw Writer's Block Initiative (SWB Initiative) is open to everyone – and I mean everyone – who's ever won against writer's block. And if you're battling it right now…well, you've got perfect timing! Focus on a small plot bunny that just won't leave you alone and write a one-shot of your choice. Be sure to mention the Initiative or SWB Initiative. Come on, let's kick writer's block's a$$!<strong>


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